It's funny how we spend our lives searching for love.
Initially from our parents, siblings then onto friends at school. perhaps even a school crush. We head out into the big world and look for some love, whether it may be fun & uncommitted or deep & all in. We then may choose to have children and want to continue to cultivate love around us =, to expand out meaning and to find that nirvana will all have been told exists.
But what if the only love, and the one we are very rarely told to cultivate is the one within ourselves?
I mention this, only because in true HH style and as I have discovered my business always seems to be in such flow state with my own personal development and what I am deep in at the moment and what funnily, is arising at a time of Mother’s Day.. a day sold to us to celebrate out Mother’s, is a new direction asked of me..
To mother myself.
Yes, this seems like a concept we may know of. But do we really know?
I have spent a lifetime looking for a mum. Whether it was hoping that my birth mother may step up and claim me as her child, and do the things one might expect a mother to do or searching for the feels that a relationship like that could be like, through the work I did in bridal makeup watching mums be there for their daughters.
BUT this was all so loaded with expectation. And if Im being real, there is still a lot there, always the hope that things might get a little better than it is, that it might work out and they might show up. And then this year its finally shown itself to me.
Who was the woman that showed up for me time and time again? Who was the person who held me when I was sad? Who was the woman who backed me?
It was me.
It was Hilary Holmes who showed up when I was overwhelmed as a mum, who wanted to break down (and still do) at the responsibility of running a business and being a mum, who just wished for someone to rub her on the back when she needed some love. I showed up for myself. It might not have been amazing but I did and I will continue to always back myself.
So with Mother’s Day coming around.. I'm seeing through a different lens and proposing that amongst celebrating any woman who has shown up for you in your life.. that maybe one to really celebrate and honour is the one who shows up for you every damn minute of the day and that’s YOU.
Happy Mother’s Day to you and to me (hehe). Well done my love, let's continue to cultivate this idea and want to show up to really lean into Mothering ourselves in a way that we truly need.
Much love, Hilary